Hollywood legend Joan Collins dishes the dirt on her co-stars, husbands and more in One Night With Joan
“My life has been a roller-coaster! More ups and downs than Joan Rivers’ Face.”
November 06, 2013
Last night, Hollywood icon Joan Collins packed BB King’s with fans eager to hear her tales of fame and fortune. After a playful intro from Scissor Sisters front woman Ana Matronic, it seemed that Joan had planned to open her one-woman show by interrupting a short Dynasty montage as she stormed onto the stage in her shimmering disco-ball pants, silver satin blouse and sparkling jewels. But she could barely get the “Stop! Wait! Hold on!” out as the crowd rose to their feet and drowned her out with applause.
Joan started out with tales from her childhood and early acting career, showing with a sense of self-deprecating humor that family connections in show business was no guarantee of glamorous roles. She took us through a multimedia memoir of her life and work, sharing personal details about her family, her scandals, her many marriages (and divorces) and reminding her fans of their favorite clips and headlines. And boy did she spill the tea on her fellow Hollywood stars!
On Bing Crosby: “…a grumpy old man… It may have looked like fun, but it was like kissing an ashtray.”
On Joan Crawford (just after a face-to-face snub): “I’ve always admired you! My mother loved you so much, she named me after you!”
On the film Cleopatra: “The face that launched a thousand ships. Or as we called her, ‘A face that lunched on fish and chips.’ I was talking about Cleopatra, not Elizabeth Taylor!”
On herself: “My life has been a roller-coaster! More ups and downs than Joan Rivers’ Face.”
And when Joan Rivers asked her which husband was the best lover, she smiled and answered, “Well, yours, darling.” Clock the vintage shade!
The segment that seemed the most satisfying for the crowd was when she focused on Dynasty. Of course, there was a catfight montage that did not make use of stunt doubles. And there were plenty of shots of her outfits with towering shoulder pads. “Sometimes, we had to walk through the door sideways… Those shoulder pads were more flattering than an Italian waiter!”
We all shared a good laugh when Joan stated, “Not to toot my own horn, but I was flawless onDynasty,” and followed up with a solid two minutes of bloopers.
After receiving another standing ovation at the conclusion of the show, she came back out (white wine in hand) and took questions from the audience, which is when we spotted Alan Cumming in the front row. Highlights included when a gentleman asked for her thoughts on why she has such a huge gay following: “Well, I believe it’s because gays have such great taste!” and when another asked whether Bette Davis taught her how to be a true bitch: “No. Anyone else?”
Daniel Nardicio, who produced the event, was in high spirits last night, telling us how excited he was to continue to offer more than just underwear parties to his following. “They like to get down and dirty, but they are cultured and smart and want more than just to talk about Madonna vs. Gaga. Zzzzzzzzzzz. So I am now offering that.”
It seems that Daniel’s famed Icon Series is not just confined to Fire Island anymore. He tipped us off to an exclusive tidbit of information: “I'm about to announce a Justin Vivian Bond/Carol Channing show in New York. It was such a huge hit on Fire Island why deprive Manhattan?”